2 three years long relationships; one has gone down the drain and the other on a very rocky patch. The very 4 persons involved in both are close to me and yet there's nothing much I can do.
Hai~ I really feel powerless. If only I was a cupid, I would be able to inject some love and romance into their waning relationships. Sadly, I am not... All I can do is lend a listening ear and give some advice. I suppose this isn't quite enough to salvage somebody else's relationship.
Coincidentally, both my younger sis and Wendy confided in me regarding their relationships last night. As much as I wanted to do my proj, I simply couldn't leave them in the lurch when they needed my deep listening. My sis was on the verge of tears when she spoke to me about Phoebe. Wendy was far worse. She was inconsolable. She had just broken up with MK. If I had been a lil weaker, I would have cried with them...
In all honesty, my sis and Wendy have a lot in common with regards to their mentality. They are too pessimistic and it was really hard for me to get my point across to them. Even so, I tried as hard as I could to make them see things in a brighter light. I dunno how much they have learnt from listening to me but I hope they can at least feel comforted that someone was there to listen to their sorrows.
Not too long ago, I was just like them. Back then, not a day had gone by without me feeling at least a bit dejected. Somehow, I dun reall know how, I have managed to change for the better. Although I am still some way from being a jovial and optimistic person, I am working hard towards it. Being on this journey alone can be somewhat boring. I want them to join me. I want them to see the bigger picture that I see now.
Not that I really believe in God, but if there really is one or many out there, please try to show these 2 girls some mercy. Guide them to the path that I wanna embark. For this alone, I pray to you...
Powerless...
Deepest Condolences...
Haven't blogged for quite a while ya. Dun feel like getting started on my FEB proj yet so here I am writing typing this entry.
Earlier this week, HH's granny passed away. Hai~ When I learnt bout it, I felt kinda guilty. I promised HH a few weeks back that I would accompany him to the hospital and visit his granny but that didn't materialise. Guilt stricken, I made a point to at least pay my last respects at her wake. Being able to offer a joss stick at the altar and utter a few parting words did offer some sort of reprieve.
I am glad that HH is coping wit it rather well. However, I must comment that he's really noob. He knows nuts bout wakes and funerals. Not saying that I am a pro here, at least I know some of the customs. Like always, I filled him in on the customary practices at a wake.
Noob he may be, HH is actually quite an emotional and sentimental boy. These customs gave me the opportunity to hear HH cry over the phone. He was confused, disappointed and infuriated by how some of his relatives reacted at his granny's wake. He couldn't understand why his christian relatives refused to offer joss sticks or participate in the prayer sessions.
Personally, I have always felt a wake is an event for family and friends to pay their last respects and offer their condolences to the deceased and his/her kins respectively. A wake transcends all boundaries - race, religion and dialect. Some pple are just too rigid and live in their own boxes. They only believe and see whatever is avaible in their boxes. Being one-dimensional isn't really a bad thing. Nonetheless, there are occasions where one needs to use a bit of common sense and think out of the box. Sadly, some pple just lack in this department. How can these pple survive in our dynamic, ever-changing society baffles me to no end...
Since I am on this topic, I might as well comment on something related. Just read Jolene's blog before starting this entry and there was this post of hers on how pple commented on what she wore. It reminded me of an incident that happened a few days back in school. A small grp of girls from my lecture group walked past me in FC6 and commented on my attire. They found it gay. To tell ya the truth, I am not the least bit affected by what they had said coz I hav heard this kinda comments numerous times. I would take gay anyday compared to beng. At the very least, gays are more sophisticated and cultured.
My point is, we live in a very judgemental and stereotypical society. If we get affected by every lil thing pple say, we are gonna live in misery. So Jol, dun bother bout what those imbeciles said k.
Melancholic...
Do you know there are actually 4 types of temperament - sanguine, choleric, melancholic and phlegmatic? I bet you don't. Hahaha!!! Losers......... Nah~ Just kidding. I wouldn't know either if I haven't taken psychology as my gem. Anyway, guess which type do I belong to?
For my friends who know me rather well, I think the answer is kinda a no brainer. Even I guessed it myself before doing any tests. I am indeed a melancholic. It's no wonder my life is struck with a chord of melancholy. Lol!!! Just kidding again. This isn't what make one a melancholic.
Not surprisingly, a melancholic is normally the one with the highest IQ in the family. Not trying to praise myself but I do agree with a rather high level of confidence. To a lesser extent, I do fall under the trait of caring for others more than myself. This brings me to the point I wanna make on this entry.
Time and again, I am confronted by this one particular question. Why and how some pple can be so selfish??? Come on... I, myself, am no messiah of mankind. I don't go ard spreading love to everyone on the streets or whatsoever. I do have my selfish moments but I try to keep that to a minimum. The message I am trying to bring across is very simple. I honestly believe one shouldn't be so self-centered most of the time, if not all the time. At least have the decency and capacity to love and care bout ur family and friends. Dun look at things from a narrow perspective that revolves ard me, myself and I.
Who the hell in the world doesn't wanna grab centre stage! Then again, who are the ones giving the applauds??? Your family, friends and community for crying out loud! Without them, you are worth nothing, not even a piece of crap. Imagine a world with only you. You have everything to yourself. Whatever you do is right. You grow old and wither by yourself. Eventually, you will realise life hasn't been a bed of roses coz you have no one to share it with or even witness it. Tears roll down your eyes while you lie on ur deathbed filled with loneliness.
You can brush my words off as a load of bullshit. You can continue deluding yourself that you still have ur family and a few really good frenz by ur side and no matter how things pan out, those pple will stand by you. Trust me, they can put up with your nonsense for 1 month, 1 year or even 1 decade; however, they would probably reach their threshold at a certain point of time. As a matter of fact, my patience for someone on this context is wearing really thin. You probably just regard me as a poly fren and nothing more. So be it... It will hurt you more than it hurts me if you dun mend your ways. Like I said earlier, your so called best friends would most likely bail out on you in due time if you dun change. What I dun want is for the somewhat threadbare harmony in the 09 clique to be affected.
If you insist on being the imbecile that you are, try your best not to step on my tail. I have given you a reminder so be warned...
Baby's Fart!!!!!!!!!!!!!
