"Mondays with Psycho" Chapter 3 - Societal Stereotypes (Edited)

To be honest, my internship has drained the zest out of me. I don't really feel like doing anything, not even blogging. I just feel like lazing in front of my laptop and watch movie after movie to rest my tired body and soul. But... I have to satisfy my readers. As much as I wanna watch movie right now, I know I have the duty to update my blog for whoever that might have an interest, even if it's only one person. Therefore, I shall continue my "Mondays with Psycho" with chapter 3.

As I had promised, chapter 3 will be on societal stereotype. An idea given to me by Sherilyn, my partner in crime at VATit Pte Ltd. Lol!!!!!

In short, societal stereotype is the perception of a person on the basis of a society's norm. Since the day you were born, you would have been immersed in the values of your society. These values are subconsciously instilled into your mind throughout the many phases of life. However, these values aren't permanent, they could be changed under the influence of external factors.

Frankly speaking, although my family is rather dysfunctional, I can say my upbringing is rather conventional until I reached the age of 12. My mom is kinda conservative in her thinking which is pretty much in tandem to the normal asian culture. During my younger years, she was the one inculcating me with the do's and don'ts, right and wrong. Sadly, the guidance came to an abrupt halt when my parents got divorced when I was 12. After which, it was really learn as you grow for me given the fact that I hav a father who cannot care less.

I can still recall vividly that one day when I was looking through my father's belongings in his car when I was ard 14. I managed to find this box of condom and you can never imagine what my father said to me at that very moment. "Ah ren, yao yong cai na, mei you yong jiu fang hui ju." In english, he told me to take only if I need it, if not, put it back. In case any of you are wondering, I didn't take it back then.

Apart from my father, I suppose my liking for english sitcoms has a hand in moulding my character as well. The westerners have always been more liberal than asians and consequentially, so am I compared to most of my peers. Not forgetting to mention that my younger sis is also a lesbian. All these attributed to why I deviate from the norm in many aspects of life.

To me, I feel it's perfectly fine to be wit someone of different races, with a large age gap or even attached or married. My 2nd gf is a malay and my most recent one is 8 years my senior. She was still married when we first started for crying out loud!!! But do I really care?!?! Fricking no!!!! As far as I am concerned, if you like someone, there should be no barriers too great. Do you think likewise? I really doubt so. The most common perception would be that of I was a toyboy living off my older gf. Well... You are entitled to think in whatever ways you like. As long as I know that's not the case, I really dun giv a damn bout what you think.

To a certain extent, my FMUS1 faced a similar sort of problem when she was wit Indian a.k.a Dey. Hahaha!!! Being a chinese having an indian BF, it definitely attracted stares. If I am not mistaken, her dad wasn't really supportive of the cross-racial relationship. Did that stop her from being with Indian?!?! Nope! For that, I kow-tow to her. They had genuine feelings for each other so why not. Stop being a racist and you will open the door to more options.

Relationships aside, appearance is the one thing that gets the most stereotypes. And let me tell you, I am no stranger to that. Just last week alone, I had my auntie telling my cousin that I looked like a "cha bo" coz I was carrying a tote bag; and my army fren's gf asking if I am normal coz of the yellow v-necked top I wore and the movies I had watched recently and am going to watch soon. Is a tote only for ladies? Is a romantic comedy gay? Is it not possible for a man to be sentimental and tear when watching a sad movie? Is wearing a yellow v-necked top effeminate when your favourite colour is yellow and the v-necked collar accentuates your neckline? They could have laboured me as flamboyant, metrosexual, sentimental and sensitive. Apparently, they did not coz all that I had just mentioned were deviances to their perceived norms. Like I said, I have a lesbian sister and I ever worked in the retail line so I get to interact with pple with loads of flair. Sometimes, pple just need to step out of their small tiny boxes and get to see the world in a more vibrant way.

Ironically, I cannot understand how some pple can see me as a gay and some see me as an Ah Beng. From my personal opinion, these 2 cannot match. One being more sophisticated and the other being more vulgar. I do admit I can look rather fierce at times due to my features and complexion. However, if you really know me, you can see how different I am from an Ah Beng. Miles apart, I have to say. I hardly use expletives and I am too smart to be one. Then again, my appearance paints the image of one so pple perceive me as one.

It never ceases to astonish me how many different ways pple could perceive me to be. The bottomline is, those are just societal stereotypes. Not exactly what I truly am.

I have been going on and on and on about how pple tend to stereotype. Being a victim of those stereotypes, I used myself as an example. Truth be told, I am also guilty of stereotyping. As humans, stereotyping is somewhat part and parcel of life. It's really quite unavoidable when you get to see pple that are different from you. The thing is, it doesn't matter whether you stereotype or not, it is more of how often you stereotype and to what degree.

The more exposure you get, the greater the experience and knowledge. With an open mind, you tend to acclimatize faster and easier with changes which lessens the tendency to stereotype. So for those out there who stereotype very often, here is a piece of advice for you. Step out of your mundane life and experience what living is like. At least, this is what I am trying to do...