It was in the year 1985, May 18th, when I was probably taking my first baby steps that a girl by the name of Amanda Zee Wan Fung was born. She was then born into a family totally unrelated to mine and there was no chance in the world I would come into contact with her. Through our adolescent years, events unfolded and with a twist of fate, we ended up in the same secondary school.
Being one year her senior, it wouldn't be shocking to hear that we hadn't caught each other eyes back during our secondary school days. More surprising was the mere fact that she hadn't even heard of me!!! Seriously, how was that even possible when I was kinda notorious in sec school and I hanged out with some guys from her batch!!! Furthermore, her then very close fren, Joanne, was a student councillor that saw me almost everyday during recess coz I was hardly punctual for school and had to serve detention. As much as she can protest, I honestly believe she was a dork living in her own world during sec school days. Lol!!!
Whatever the reason, it was no longer important since the day I went to Suntec City to look for Joanne. Amanda and her were working there and that was the "first time" I saw Amanda. The rest as they say, was history...
Our friendship blossomed faster than I could have expected and truthfully, I am really glad it happened the way it did. Those days when I would crash at her hostel and play tennis the next day were truly fun. Nagging at her to go bathe simply added to the enjoyment. Hahaha!!! How we managed to be so close is in no small part due to our common love, Man Utd. Bcoz of this common love, she is affectionately known as my Fmus1 and I am her Fmus2.
As we grow older and supposedly more matured, coupled with her graduation from NUS, there are certain things that we no longer do, like staying over in her hostel. However, we more than made up for it by confiding in each other when we have problems. To me, she has become a soulmate, acting like a beacon when I am lost in the dark.
From time to time, I can't help but imagine the lost I would have suffered if our lives hadn't crossed path. Hence, I am grateful to her parents for having pik piak, conceived and given birth to her. It has since been 24 years from the day she came into this world and I wonder how many lives she has touched. Most importantly, she has touched mine and I can't thank her enough. I just wanna wish her a Happy 24th Birthday and hopefully I would be able to give her the present as I have promised sooner rather than later...
24 Years Ago...
Tong Tong's Journey to Malacca...
It's so fricking hot out here and what's that damn thing in front of me! Blur~
Look at me turn. Very soon, I will be able to crawl to Shu Shu.
Withdrawal Syndrome From Non-Titoing...
Kangtao la!!!! As diagnosed by my Fmus1, who knows me inside out, outside in, I am officially suffering from non-titoing withdrawal syndrome. Ji tao sian can!!!!
Hai~ I am not gonna go into the details of this syndrome but let me tell you, when you are suffering from it, YOU ARE IN DEEP SHIT!!!!!!! In a way or another, it sucks the zest out of your life and makes everything mundane and boring.
Like how my Fmus1 put it, maybe I should join a recruitment agency and be always on the prowl for kips to tito. Lol!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Honestly speaking, I really had no idea that my Fmus1 could be so humorous. That timbre is one hell of a lucky bastard!!! Hahaha!!!!!!! Pls dun tire my Fmus1 with your pp's requests if not she wun be able to tell me jokes liao.
If you really think bout it and look ard, there are actually kips all ard. The thing is whether they are titoable remains to be seen. Therefore, sad to say, I am not gonna recover any time soon!!!!!
Weakened Resolve...
Boredom kills.......or so it's said to be. Nah~ To me it doesn't but it certainly weakened my resolve. Hai~ I did something that I really shouldn't have done.
Slacking at Ah Da's place with nothing else to do, I inexplicably had the urge to msg her and eventually I did. Why did I even change my handphone number in the first place!!! I wanted to shut her out of my life and there I was letting her in again. Tio tio tio....
It really got me thinking. As much as I enjoy my singlehood, there are times when I would feel lonely and bored, and really need a companion. I do have friends that I could hang out and spend time with. However, the feel is really different if you know what I mean. Imagine if I had a gf, I would most likely not be at Ah Da's place, probably spending time with her and given how faithful a bf I could be, there's no chance of me msging her!
Omg!!! There I go again ranting about how much I need someone... Maybe I do, maybe I don't. The thing is, I know I am not ready to have one simply bcoz I don't have enough time and money. I need time for school, tuitions, family, friends and myself. Throw in a gf and there goes my sleep. I need money for retail therapy, class 2B lessons and eventually class 3, grad trip, family trip, my food and chloe's food, some other miscellaneous expenses. Add in expenses on my gf and I can say goodbye to my retail therapy, grad and family trips, class 2B and class 3 lessons. When you put everything into perspective, it's really hard to find that someone accomodating enough to settle down with. That's why I have been incessantly telling myself that having a gf is like the least of my priorities. Inevitably, this resolve has also been weakened with the very existence of this entry.
Sometimes I really do wonder how Mendi managed to survive his 25 years of mundane life without ever having a gf. Perhaps the recent LSB visits did soothe his pain a lil. Lol!!! At the very least, he gotta know how it feels like to TNN and make full use of his large fingers. Hahahah!!! Mendi, pls dun kill me... I am simply too bored, that's all...
21/12/2012...
Come 21/12/2012, would I still be able to sit in front of my laptop and comfort of my own home posting entry?!?!?!?!
I suppose no one could answer this question as we are merely humans. But why this date? Well... For those that are still ignorant or oblivious to the prophecy, this date is deemed to be DOOMSDAY!!!
If you ask me if I believe in it, I would consider myself to be sitting on the fence. Frankly speaking, most of us have heard of other prophecies over the past decade and apparently, none of them has come true. However, this one is somewhat different. It kinda coincides with the end of Mayan calendar and the peak of Solar activity. I even saw an article on the papers reporting on NASA's revelation on the likely impact that the solar flares might caused in 2012.
It got me thinking. Is it even worth studying or working now when you know the world might be coming to an end? I really dun wanna waste time doing stuff that ultimately you know would count for nothing. Then again, who can be sure... As long as it hasn't happened, we have no choice but to do what we do or are supposed to do simply because of the likelihood that it might not happen.
At the very least, even if it does happen, I am not afraid. In fact, I am kinda excited. Can you imagine! It's something like what you see in "Armageddon"! Imagine myself saying on national television, "I'm speaking to you not as a citizen of Singapore, not as a student of SP, not as your fren from GMH/Tummy Gang, but as a member of humanity. We are faced with a catastrophe so great that none has ever witnessed throughout the history of mankind; so devastating that it would wipe out the whole of humanity. God speed to all of you...."
I have always imagined myself hugging the one I love when the day comes. You know... "Till death do us part" that sort of thing. Since I don't really have a partner that I love right now, I guess my fantasy won't come true. Then again, there are many other stuff that I wanna do and couldn't have done if Doomsday isn't coming. For example, I wanna punch all those that I hate or dislike right in their faces. Maybe even cripple them. Lol!!!!!!!! Of course the list goes on and on but I can't be too explicit if not, the police might just pay me a visit sooner rather than later.
According to the prophets, we still have approximately 3 and a half years to live so why worry about something that we have no control over. I say we should just live life, get paid and get laid...
God Sent. . . . .
Have you ever felt there's someone in your life that you were destined to meet??? I certainly do. In fact, there are so many of them; my GMH members, My Tummy Gang members, some DBA09 mates, Bro Edward, Benny, Wendy, 9AMB army buddy, Lucas, even Huishan and Mei.
Most of them have a positive influence and are of utmost importance to me. They have seen me fall and pick myself up over and over again through these years and relentlessly lending a helping hand; and some even went through thick and thin with me. I call these pple the "Untouchables". Their position in my heart will never ever be replaced. If need be, I am more than willing to put my life on the line for their sake. Definitely, my GMH and Tummy Gang members along with Bro Edward and Benny belong to the "Untouchables".
After the "Untouchables", I have the 2nd tier of DBA09 mates, Wendy, Lucas and 9AMB buddy. These peeps are also held very close to my heart. Any closer, they would be in the "Untouchables" category.
Unfortunately, Huishan and Mei are the 2 that I would rather not have met. The former left a cut so deep that it can never be healed completely and the latter contrived to pour salt on it. I suppose I won't be able to forget them simply due to the scar and pain they had inflicted on me.
Well... Like I have mentioned many times before, God always have the knack of playing games with us. For all the misery, God bestowed upon me my FMUS1 to soothe the pain and lighten the scar. She belongs to the heavenly realm of "God sent" above the "Untouchables". Just like how Sher described her bestie. FMUS1 has always been my female bestie but maybe all along, she has been more than that. Underneath the tough exterior, FMUS1 is as sweet as strawberry chocolate. Lol!!! FMUS1, I hope you like the metaphor.
Over the course of our relatively short friendship of ard 5 years, I have been blessed with lil gifts from my FMUS1 that meant a hell lot. A few years back when I tore my knee ligament, she gave me a miniature cushion Rugby 7 nations ball. Truth be told, it isn't so much to do with the ball, it is the words that were written on it. Words of encouragement to pull me out of the deepest and darkest abyss of self-pity.
Of course, there were also others like "Tuesdays with Morrie" and "Numero 2" diary. I shan't go further if not I might just get too emo and tear. I just might....
Just wanna post the pic of my FMUS1's latest interpretation of our friendship...
"Mondays with Psycho" Chapter 3 - Societal Stereotypes (Edited)
To be honest, my internship has drained the zest out of me. I don't really feel like doing anything, not even blogging. I just feel like lazing in front of my laptop and watch movie after movie to rest my tired body and soul. But... I have to satisfy my readers. As much as I wanna watch movie right now, I know I have the duty to update my blog for whoever that might have an interest, even if it's only one person. Therefore, I shall continue my "Mondays with Psycho" with chapter 3.
As I had promised, chapter 3 will be on societal stereotype. An idea given to me by Sherilyn, my partner in crime at VATit Pte Ltd. Lol!!!!!
In short, societal stereotype is the perception of a person on the basis of a society's norm. Since the day you were born, you would have been immersed in the values of your society. These values are subconsciously instilled into your mind throughout the many phases of life. However, these values aren't permanent, they could be changed under the influence of external factors.
Frankly speaking, although my family is rather dysfunctional, I can say my upbringing is rather conventional until I reached the age of 12. My mom is kinda conservative in her thinking which is pretty much in tandem to the normal asian culture. During my younger years, she was the one inculcating me with the do's and don'ts, right and wrong. Sadly, the guidance came to an abrupt halt when my parents got divorced when I was 12. After which, it was really learn as you grow for me given the fact that I hav a father who cannot care less.
I can still recall vividly that one day when I was looking through my father's belongings in his car when I was ard 14. I managed to find this box of condom and you can never imagine what my father said to me at that very moment. "Ah ren, yao yong cai na, mei you yong jiu fang hui ju." In english, he told me to take only if I need it, if not, put it back. In case any of you are wondering, I didn't take it back then.
Apart from my father, I suppose my liking for english sitcoms has a hand in moulding my character as well. The westerners have always been more liberal than asians and consequentially, so am I compared to most of my peers. Not forgetting to mention that my younger sis is also a lesbian. All these attributed to why I deviate from the norm in many aspects of life.
To me, I feel it's perfectly fine to be wit someone of different races, with a large age gap or even attached or married. My 2nd gf is a malay and my most recent one is 8 years my senior. She was still married when we first started for crying out loud!!! But do I really care?!?! Fricking no!!!! As far as I am concerned, if you like someone, there should be no barriers too great. Do you think likewise? I really doubt so. The most common perception would be that of I was a toyboy living off my older gf. Well... You are entitled to think in whatever ways you like. As long as I know that's not the case, I really dun giv a damn bout what you think.
To a certain extent, my FMUS1 faced a similar sort of problem when she was wit Indian a.k.a Dey. Hahaha!!! Being a chinese having an indian BF, it definitely attracted stares. If I am not mistaken, her dad wasn't really supportive of the cross-racial relationship. Did that stop her from being with Indian?!?! Nope! For that, I kow-tow to her. They had genuine feelings for each other so why not. Stop being a racist and you will open the door to more options.
Relationships aside, appearance is the one thing that gets the most stereotypes. And let me tell you, I am no stranger to that. Just last week alone, I had my auntie telling my cousin that I looked like a "cha bo" coz I was carrying a tote bag; and my army fren's gf asking if I am normal coz of the yellow v-necked top I wore and the movies I had watched recently and am going to watch soon. Is a tote only for ladies? Is a romantic comedy gay? Is it not possible for a man to be sentimental and tear when watching a sad movie? Is wearing a yellow v-necked top effeminate when your favourite colour is yellow and the v-necked collar accentuates your neckline? They could have laboured me as flamboyant, metrosexual, sentimental and sensitive. Apparently, they did not coz all that I had just mentioned were deviances to their perceived norms. Like I said, I have a lesbian sister and I ever worked in the retail line so I get to interact with pple with loads of flair. Sometimes, pple just need to step out of their small tiny boxes and get to see the world in a more vibrant way.
Ironically, I cannot understand how some pple can see me as a gay and some see me as an Ah Beng. From my personal opinion, these 2 cannot match. One being more sophisticated and the other being more vulgar. I do admit I can look rather fierce at times due to my features and complexion. However, if you really know me, you can see how different I am from an Ah Beng. Miles apart, I have to say. I hardly use expletives and I am too smart to be one. Then again, my appearance paints the image of one so pple perceive me as one.
It never ceases to astonish me how many different ways pple could perceive me to be. The bottomline is, those are just societal stereotypes. Not exactly what I truly am.
I have been going on and on and on about how pple tend to stereotype. Being a victim of those stereotypes, I used myself as an example. Truth be told, I am also guilty of stereotyping. As humans, stereotyping is somewhat part and parcel of life. It's really quite unavoidable when you get to see pple that are different from you. The thing is, it doesn't matter whether you stereotype or not, it is more of how often you stereotype and to what degree.
The more exposure you get, the greater the experience and knowledge. With an open mind, you tend to acclimatize faster and easier with changes which lessens the tendency to stereotype. So for those out there who stereotype very often, here is a piece of advice for you. Step out of your mundane life and experience what living is like. At least, this is what I am trying to do...